All's well that ends well?

Could the Commish be ready to pull a Tony Soprano?

The die is cast;

The stage is set;

All the world's a stage

Lights, cameras, action!

Somewhere, right now, David Stern is holding Jerry Buss and James Dolan hostage at gunpoint. The scene is not pretty. In fact, I'm sure that wherever the three men are right now, Stern has the sublime aura of James Gandolfini as he keeps his "gat" pointed at the two owners who have caused him various assortments of headaches this past summer.

"You two will make this deal, or else!" Stern barks out.

"Or else? Or else, what?" Dolan ask smugly.

"Or else your teams will be picking from the bottom of the lottery for the next ten years!" Stern yells back.

"Hey?!" Buss chimes in. "I thought the lottery was luck of the draw?"

Stern gives Buss the same look that hot babes give Manute Bol at the club.

"Please." Stern spews.

The NBA Commissioner saw his share of bad press this summer, and even though the negative publicity wasn't directed at any of his own actions, his league almost headed into the upcoming season with fans giving him the old Ricky Ricardo...ju got a lot of splainin' to do.

The NBA's off season of discontent was highlighted by the Tim Donaghy betting scandal and was enveloped by Buss' DUI conviction, the tragic death of Eddie Griffin and last but not least Garden-gate, featuring the New York Knicks as a misogynistic professional frat house.

The Yi JianLian situation never really gained too much steam after Stern had Vice-President Dick Cheney point a few ICBM missiles at Hong Kong and threatened the Chinese government to ensure all Chinese nationals would hence forth be drafted by the NBADL.

Lucky for Stern, some real stars decided to suit up for Uncle Sam in the FIBA tournament (a.k.a. the Vegas massacre) and Boston Celtic legends and former teammates Danny Ainge and Kevin Mchale decided to show some Celtic Pride (and loyalty) to help put the Eastern Conference back on the map come NBA Finals time.

Suddenly NBA fans were more interested in Mark Cuban's dance steps than the integrity of NBA refs. More interested in what team will Kobe Bryant be playing for when he has his next 50 point game in the Staples Center, than how a player with the talent and promise of Eddie Griffin could so easily fall off our radar and into such a decadent personal abyss that cost him his life before most of even knew that he had a problem.

The season ending surgery to number one draft pick Greg Oden was worthy of only 2-3 days of ESPN leads, as compared to a normal ESPN news cycle of 2-3 agonizing weeks (see Joe Torre), so Stern was heading into this season mildly optimistic needing one more insurance run to ensure a great year in the media if not on the court. Especially because Garden-gate was still pursed on the lips of many sports writers just waiting for the first sniff of a sound bite concerning the immediate future of Thomas, Dolan and Phi Knick Phi.

Stern got lucky again. His old friend Jerry Buss knocked in a single in the bottom of the ninth when he told reporters at the Lakers training camp the he would indeed listen to offers for the only player on his team that could start somewhere else in the league.

Now all Stern needs is for Kobe to have one more outburst and Isiah Thomas can come in and save the day for Stern, the NBA, the New York tabloids and most of all NBA blowhards looking for another New York team they can love to hate.

If you think that Alex Rodriquez coming to New York was a big deal, wait until you see Jordan Kobe come to town.

(above) One good reason for Isiah to trade five Knicks for one Kobe

Kobe Bryant playing in the largest media center on the planet would be just the coup Stern salivates for in his efforts to wield Lord of the Rings like magic over the sport that is steam rolling towards soccer as the globe's largest participation sport.

While the idea may sound preposterous at first glance, think about this: If the Knicks were to send a package of say Jamal Crawford, Eddie Curry, David Lee, Randolph Morris, Nate Robinson and a future first round draft pick to the Lakers for KB 24, a couple of things would be accomplished for both teams.

The Lakers would be getting not only the Knicks' best player but quite possibly the Knicks' best three players in Crawford, Curry and Lee. (Well, three of four, now that they have Randolph, Marbury is only considered a great player in New York) Morris and Robinson are both attractive trade bait and of course you get the first round pick. That's only one draft pick short of the deal Minnesota and Boston completed in the Garnett deal but with the exception of maybe Al Jefferson, certainly better players across the board.

The matching salary issue could be resolved with this group or something very similar.

The NBA would have two of its three most popular players playing on the east coast in prime time television slots with the two of the biggest markets and historical fan bases actually talking about championships.

Isiah Thomas could reiterate to everyone about how this was his plan all along.

The Knicks would immediately contend for the Eastern Conference title, in fact it would take KG, Ray Allen and Paul Pierce to keep Kobe out of the Finals (see Suns, Spurs and Mavs...while your at it throw Toronto in there as well). 

When LeBron lands in Brooklyn in two years, Stern will need surgery to wipe the perpetual grin off of his face.

Sure Lakers fans will be pissed off, but who cares when New York and Boston basketball games are selling commercial slots at record breaking prices and child labor camps in China are grinding out Kobe Bryant-New York jerseys 24 hours a day.

Stern will still have Phoenix, Dallas, Houston, San Antonio and a surging Utah market to satisfy west coast fans. The Kevin Durant Sonics will land in Vegas or Oklahoma City sometime in the next year, so Stern needs only one more feather in his cap before declaring himself the King of Sports.

Jordan Kobe in New York...Git-R-Done!

Vick victim of inevitable legal backlash

  Simpson sealed Vick's fate a long time ago

           I remember watching the 'not guilty' verdict handed down in the O.J. Simpson murder trial and being stunned beyond belief.

It wasn't because I thought Simpson actually killed Nicole Simpson and Ron Goldman, because I know he didn't. This is not coming from a black person who has an axe to grind with white people, but rather from a guy who knows the type of people who are capable of committing a double murder with a knife, and trust me in terms of criminal capability, Simpson isn't that talented of a murderer.

I'm one of the few people who thought the civil judement was probably justified, despite the mockery it made of the judicial system. I always felt as though Simpson played a role in their murders and was very likely present at the time of the killings.

So in that regard he should've had to fork over tens of millions of dollars for getting away with killing his baby's mama and her boy toy. most black men who commit that crime are currently on death row or still in their white Broncos ducking the feds.

While Kobe Bryant benefited from the fact that the majority of the public never really belived that he assaulted the girl who had accused him of rape, he was just as lucky that his victim was willing to get her payday without ever having to appear in a trial setting (surprise, surprise huh?).

Had Bryant been forced to endure a real live trial, things may had ended up very differently for him, this is still America.

When Bryant's legal issue came up, the biggest tell-tale that things were going to work in his favor came from one of the premeire corporations in the state of colorado, the Denver Nuggets.

Bryant was being wooed by the Nuggets to the tune of 130 million dollars while he was facing a rape charge in that state!

O.J. was well into retirement when his case came in front of the American public, but the former Heisman trophy winner had already invested years of his life courting and massaging corporate America, translation: white people, into thinking that among blacks, he was one of the good ones.

The paradox of the Vick situation is that O.J.'s victory almost seemed to empower many black entertainers and athletes by creating the facade that as long as you have enough money in the bank, you could get away with almost anything, even if you're black.

Adam 'Pacman' Jones is still walking around with hopes of playing football in the near future mainly because he's only famous because of his crimes.

Making Jones an example for the legal system wouldn't accomplish much because we all expect Pacman to go to jail sooner or later anyway.

Vick on the other hand was the payback that the judicial system has wanted ever since O.J. stood in that L.A. courtroom with that s**t-eating grin after hearing those infamous word...'not guilty'.

Outside of Peyton Manning, Vick was probably the most recognizable and marketable player in the NFL, with Reggie Bush coming on strong.

On top of that, because of all the back biting and questions about his competence by television analysts and football gurus, Vick had also become a sort of champion among the black football crowd.

That fact is extremely evident as we watch the race relations of city of Atlanta deteriorate to almost pre Civil War levels, all because of the dueling perceptions that blacks and whites have of the embattled quarterback.

 The black people's champion?

So with an opportunity to nail the biggest hero for black sports fans, in O.J.'s sport no less, the Feds were as giddy as Dick Cheney at a Halaburton proxy meeting.

Tommorrow morning when I eat my scrambled chicken embryos and fried dead animal flesh, I won't bat an eyelash for fear of PETA picketing outside of my front door.

While the alleged actions of Vick and his cohorts (what ever happened to 'stop snitching'?) may seem horrendous to many dog lovers, the abuse that animals suffer worldwide for our guilty pleasures, pales in comparison.

You would've thought that someone with Vick's bank account and a boss like Arthur Blank could've manage to squeeze Vick out of this predicament with a few million dollars spread around here and there.

Unfortunately for Vick, as bad as Blank wanted to get his hands on the Lombardi Trophy, after watching O.J. playing golf and still dating white women for the past 12 years, the judicial system wanted their trophy much, much more.

H-N-I-C  (Head NBA'er In Charge)

Curly Morris

Let's get straight to it...Kobe Bryant is the best player in the NBA...period. He is the best player, on the most glamorous team in the NBA if not the most glamorous team in all of professional sports. He is coached by the best coach in the league, who, by the way, has won three titles with Kobe on his squad. He was the only unanimous choice by NBA general managers last year to start at his position (even Shaq had two GM's pick Yao Ming ahead of him). He never played a single day in college, and by the way, he's only twenty-seven years old. Now, by the time I'm done with this piece More people will hate me than love me, but since when is that news? You can talk all you want about Duncan's fundamentals, Shaq's power, T-Mac's athleticism, whatever, Kobe is the heir apparent to the throne, the Air apparent; Get it? On top of that, in today's gangsta friendly league, a league where cornrows, baggy shorts, tattoos, and players with rap albums, run rampant, Kobe also reigns as the biggest gangsta of them all. Let the story be told:

            Kobe was one of the earliest high school phenoms to crack the league before the baby boom years the NBA feasted on until this summers' new collective bargaining agreement, which put a stop to drafting high school players straight to the league. After Darryl Dawkins and Bill Willoughby were drafted out of high school in 1975, it was twenty years before another player was given that same opportunity. Shawn Kemp and Lloyd Daniels enrolled, but never actually played, in college although they attended practice at some point. In 1995 the Minnesota Timberwolves rolled the dice with their number five pick on Kevin Garnett. With Pandora's Box having been re-opened by the T-Wolves the hunt was on. The weird dynamic of the early entries at the time was that it was the high school kids who'd pretty much forced their way onto the scene, looking to expedite the getting paid process that the last collective bargaining agreement seemed to inhibit by way of the rookie salary cap. Before Garnett, players had usually gone to college for a year, maybe two, without ever having any intentions on playing for four years. Players used the NCAA experience as merely a forum to showcase their talents for the league and jockey for position in June's draft. Even still, whenever a professional team took the time to even consider a player making the jump from the high school ranks to the pros, it usually was a low post player with the size to be a shot blocker or rebounder, the thought process being that you can't teach size, so if you can get a big man, get him, even if it takes him three years to play. Not very many people looked at guards to be quite ready to play at the professional ranks if for no other reason than the speed of the league was much faster than the collegiate game, let alone the high-school ranks. There were very few college All-Americans playing the skill positions  that could make the league, to even consider a high-school player coming straight to the NBA as a two-guard; In the Jordan era? The idea was really ludicrous, until Kobe Bryant came along.

The Player

            When the dust settled after the 1996 NBA season, the Los Angeles Lakers had Nick Van Exel, Anthony Peeler, Eddie Jones, Sedale Threat, the aforementioned Lloyd Daniels, and up-and-comer Cedric Ceballos on their squad. Ceballos had averaged over twenty points per game on a team that lost to the Rockets in the first round of the playoffs. Those same Rockets had manhandled Shaquille O'Neal and the Orlando Magic in the NBA finals the year before, and were en route to disposing of the New York Knicks and center Patrick Ewing that year. To get Kobe on their squad the Lakers had to deal the last effective remnant of their championship years, center Vlade Divac to the Charlotte Hornets in a deal that then Laker GM Jerry West orchestrated. Now, like most people, the only thing I had seen on Kobe Bryant was the same clip of some high-school game where he dribbled with his right hand around a bunch of smaller white players who looked like they were waiting for autographs instead of playing defense. On the availability of limited information about the kid, I wondered seriously if West wasn't really reaching to regain some sort of Magic Johnson type of vibe in Tinseltown. When the season began, however, it was easy to see that the kid did indeed belong in the league, although there would be some air balls in the playoffs, and some seriously flawed offensive decision making to endure for Lakers fans. Kobe averaged almost eight points per game in fifteen minutes per, and was second on the team in steals. The next season his minutes doubled as did his points per game total, and he was the third leading scorer on the team behind O'Neal and Eddie Jones. It was already evident at that time however, that any other guard who was going to remain on the Lakers roster, would be playing behind the kid who had cloned Jordan's game by the next season. So, by the time Kobe should've been a junior in college he was the starting shooting guard for the Los Angeles Lakers, gangsta.

            Already, the comparisons to Jordan were evident, as Kobe's game was so mirrored after His Airness that it was surreal to watch. Plus, Kobe had something that Jordan never had in his career with the Bulls, a bona fide center in Shaquille O'Neal. Del Harris, Bill Bertka, and Kurt Rambis, all deferred to management as Kobe began imposing his will and persona on the team. Clashes with Shaq began early as Kobe, rightfully so, envisioned himself as the second coming, and felt that he, not Shaq, should be the focus of the offense. As trouble began brewing in Hollywood, Mr. Basketball, Jerry West bought in a personality guru named Phil Jackson and hired him to be the Lakers head coach, what happened next was merely an NBA Championship, that's what, gansta.

            Whenever I hear someone say, Kobe never won a championship without Shaq, I cannot, no matter how hard I try, not respond that Shaq has never won a championship without Kobe either. Phil Jackson, on the other hand, has won titles without either of them, and that is why his return to the Lakers speaks volumes about where Phil thinks the future of the league is, but more on that later. The difference in the NBA championship many years comes down to coaching. Good coaching brings good execution, and good execution wins games. In the famed triangle offense, Phil Jackson managed to win six titles with such household names as Stacy King, Bill Cartwright, Bill Wennington, Luc Longley, John Salley, and Scott Williams playing center. Yet it still took Jordan seven years in the league and two with Phil Jackson to win a title, Kobe; four and one respectively, gangsta.

            Kobe Bryant wanted to be Jordan early on. In fact most kids on playgrounds worldwide who group up watching the Chicago Bulls dominate the NBA landscape for nearly a decade wanted to be Jordan. Remember the commercial, I want to be like Mike? I mean sheesh, even Bugs Bunny wanted to be like Mike. Kobe, was like Mike, exactly like him, his offensive moves, his defensive posture, his tongue wagging, armband, jump shot, on camera demeanor, endorsements, etc... Kobe even had to put up with the initial "hater-rade" that Jordan had to endure when he first came into the league. People felt like Kobe wanted to shoot too much, the same knock people through on Allen Iverson when he came into the league. The truth of the matter is that Kobe had accomplished something that scientists worldwide had not even begun to scratch the surface of, wireless cloning.  To say that Kobe's game is patterned after Michael Jordan is a supreme understatement. For all intensive purposes not only is Kobe Bryant as good as Michael Jordan, I'll go out on a limb and say the most blasphemous thing that any basketball fan could ever utter, Kobe is better than Jordan. Jordan couldn't even make his high school's varsity team until his junior year. By Kobe's junior year, the NBA already knew who he was, and the league had already made the decision to draft him after he graduated, gangsta. As I stated earlier at the age of twenty seven Kobe already has three world championships to his credit. Jordan won his first championship at the age of twenty-eight. Although Jordan did not have Shaquille O'Neal on his team, he did have Scottie Pippen another player who was voted among the NBA's top fifty players of all time. When Michael Jordan came into the league there were plenty of fans who felt that he could never measure up to Julius Erving, the legendary star of the defunct American Basketball Association who jumped to the NBA after the leagues merged and promptly became a household name overnight due to his high flying acrobatic playing style. Many basketball fans felt that Jordan shot the ball too much and relied on his dunking ability to score thereby making him a less complete player. A lot of Jordan's peers in the league envied the attention and endorsements that were thrown Jordan's way when he first entered the league. Jordan completely changed the economics of sports as we know it and for that he received an icy reception as, in most areas of society people are resistant to change. Flash to 1996 and some kid from a private school in Philadelphia named Kobe Bryant who looked like a wannabe Michael Jordan gets drafted in the first round by the legendary basketball guru Jerry West. The kid immediately comes into the league and starts jacking shots from all over the court, tries to dunk on anyone who cared to challenge him, and did not reserve his aggressive play to the regular season, but rather finds himself taking crucial shots in the playoffs, shots that are usually designed for veteran players to take, gangsta.

The Scandal

            When Michael Jordan's father, James Jordan, was murdered in 1993, there were speculations, unfounded of course, that the elder Jordan's death may have somehow been connected to Jordan's insatiable appetite for gambling. The controversial tint behind that story quickly dissipated. Michael had already distinguished himself from his peers by both his obviously superior basketball talent as well as his marketing potential. There was no way that the powers that be in professional hoops were about to let the "cash cow" that was Michael Jordan get away for anything less than a murder, or rape conviction. Jump ahead to December 2003, and Mr. Bryant has been charged with the sexual assault of a nineteen year old female hotel employee in Colorado, a white female hotel employee. For most professional athletes, excuse me, black professional athletes, this would be tantamount to some jail time or at the very least, an expulsion or long term suspension from their respective league. What was different about Kobe as compared to say O.J. Simpson, and Mike Tyson, was that almost from the outset, there were many people who felt that Kobe was innocent even though he admitted to having sex with the woman. In the history of race relations the acquittal of O.J. Simpson and the dropping of all charges levied against Kobe Bryant have to rate as two of the more unlikely outcomes of unlikely circumstances that could even be fathomed by anyone anywhere. Mike Tyson on the other hand was accused of raping a black woman and served three years in prison. Not only did all charges against Kobe get dropped, but while he was on trial in Colorado, the Colorado representatives of the NBA, the Denver Nuggets, were trying to convince Kobe to come play basketball for them. So essentially, as the State of Colorado was giving the woman who had accused Kobe of rape 100 thousand dollars for being the victim of a sexual assault, a state supported professional sports franchise was offering the man accused of assaulting her over 100 million dollars in salary, gangsta.

The Takeover

            Jordan's Bulls won six titles and probably could have won more had the core of their team stayed together. When the Bulls' championship run ended, many people blamed then Bulls GM Jerry Krause. It was Krause's financial decision making, and stormy relationship with Jordan, who felt like Krause was taking too much credit for what Jordan had done, and Scottie Pippen, who felt insulted at how much money, or rather, how little money the Bulls wanted to pay him. The relationship between Phil Jackson and the Bulls' management went sour fast after contract negotiations broke down between the Hall-of-Fame coach and management. Phil decided to exit, and that left Jordan to lead his teammates. Jordan's stance was clear, no Phil, no Mike. Caught in the middle of this power struggle were all the other Bulls players who had become accustomed to winning championships. If we travel through time to the year 2004 an eerily similar scenario is beginning to unfold. The Los Angeles Lakers, who have won three championships with Shaquille O'Neal, Kobe Bryant, and Phil Jackson, are now faced with some hard financial decisions to make. Both of their premier players as well as their coach have new contracts to negotiate. As always, a franchise as storied as the Lakers will always have their eyes toward the future, and as big of a presence as Shaquille O'Neal may have been, you must remember that before Shaq ever arrived in Hollywood the Lakers had already won eleven NBA Championships. By the way, they've also had the likes of Kareem Abdul Jabbar, Magic Johnson, Wilt Chamberlain, Jerry West, George Mikan, Elgin Baylor, James Worthy, on their roster, all of whom were selected as members of the fifty greatest players in NBA history. So as big as Shaq may have been, Jerry Buss, owner of the Lakers, a man who is intelligent enough to have received his PhD in chemistry at the age of twenty-four, decided that I the midst of all the turmoil and inner strife going on in the Lakers locker room, it was wiser to re-sign Kobe and let Shaq finish his career someplace else. In fact as well as not re-signing Shaq, Buss let perennial all-stars Gary Payton, Karl Malone beat it as well. Not even Phil Jackson was high enough on the Lakers priority list to interfere with Buss' coddling of his young, just missed becoming a convicted felon, superstar. In a nutshell, the Lakers ran three Hall-of-Fame players and a Hall-of-Fame coach out of town, to ensure that Kobe Bryant could be happy and thrive, even though he admitted to adultery, and had to endure a trail for sexual assault on a nineteen year old white girl in the middle of a season. By the way, over the summer Nike, the sports apparel behemoth and home of brand Jordan, decided to give Kobe a new sneaker for his upcoming season, gangsta.

The Future

            Phil Jackson has coached his teams to nine NBA titles. That record ties him with legendary Boston Celtics coach Red Auerbach, for the most coaching titles ever. Because Phil is arguably the greatest coach in league history, when the Lakers left him a free agent, he could have his choice of teams to coach in the league, with the exception of the defending champion San Antonio Spurs. Jackson could have coached for the team he won an NBA title with as a player, the New York Knicks, or he could've coached the team that Shaquille O'Neal plays for now the Miami Heat, and he could've written a blank check to come aboard. So where did Jackson decide to resume his quest for the championship that would give him one up on his rival Auerbach? Why, Jackson decided to try to win with Kobe Bryant of course. Bryant, who had to give his approval before Jackson returned, has been even more Jordan-like in his demeanor since he ran all of his dead weight out of town. He brought back Jordan's old coach. He has been visibly philanthropic and social far beyond his previous years. He and wife Vanessa, (who contrary to popular opinion did not use the whole sexual assault case as reason to get half of Kobe's riches), have a second child on the way. Now that the Lakers are his team, he has even become likeable to his teammates. The haters still point to Kobe buying his wife a five million dollar ring to pacify his wife from the trial, and his supposed selling out of Shaq when he got interrogated by Colorado police. Firstly, any married man knows that if you upset your wife by getting caught knocking boots with a nineteen year old hotel employee, you'd better buy her something, or buy yourself a divorce lawyer. Never before has the expression "it's cheaper to keep her" been more applicable. With about a hundred million dollars on the line, five million was the easy way out. As for Kobe squealing on Shaq, I say whatever. I know a bunch of guys who claim to be hardcore and thugs and all that, but when the district attorney was throwing prison terms at them, have sung like pre-crack Whitney Houston. Not Shaq, Kobe, Phil Jackson, and all the millionaire athletes who claim an affinity to the hood have any real sense of what it's like to have to deal with the police on a day to day basis as many of their fans do. Kobe is a millionaire who was probably scared to death of the police, the publicity, and prison, so he said something stupid. Shaq said something stupid when he arrived in Miami claiming that the Heat were going to win three or four titles in the coming years, not without Kobe Bryant he won't, gangsta.