Pardon me for being a little bit stunned. But the Commish says so, which means the Pats are perps. What stuns me is not that the cheating claim is true, but that it's the Pats who did it. If it had been a perennial  doormat trying to gain an edge, it would make a little more "sense". But NE, and the genius, against the J E T S, Jets?

If I was a betting man. I'd have bet the house that the Pats wouldn't cheat to beat the Jets, or any other team for that matter. But they did. And now we find that it isn't the first time they've been caught. Turns out the NFL warned them already about using the same tack against the Pack.

Looks like Roger Goodell's legal experience is coming in handy because the NFL has no shortage of miscreants to offer up for ajudication. But this is a whole new ball game, when teams are now on the stand.

So what next? Can Rough-Guy Roger afford to take it light on one of the NFL's showpiece franchises? Or is he compelled to make an example of a team that (evidently) believes that merely raiding the free agent talent pool doesn't get the job done nowadays.

Well, here's what we know. What was once renowned as one of the classiest organizations deserves to be reviled as one of the cheesiest. What on earth were they thinking?

The rumor is that the Pats will be exposed to the loss of multiple draft choices. That's a good idea, it's almost standard fare for teams that violate league rules. But is that enough. I don't think so.

How can a commissioner who suspends players for entire seasons because their conduct gives the league a black eye, afford to be lenient on a team that cheats to win?

Yes, the loss of draft picks is potentially very damaging. But I have to stress the "potentially" aspect. Draft picks go bust too often. And a fine? Fines don't hurt teams like they hurt players. Teams just raise ticket prices. Fans pay fines, not teams.

So what do we do to send the message to the Pats? I say we put 'em on playoff probation. College teams get the postseason "sit-down" for infractions all the time. After all, we hit players where it hurts most, in the game check. If we can suspend Tank Williams and Pac-Man for a season and send Mike Vick to purgatory, we really ought to hit a franchise where it hurts the most too, in the post-season. Because the Pats won't miss a beat if they can't draft WR's, they'll just pour a few million on Randy and Dante and move forward. And the NFL could fine them 50 million dollars, which their loyal fans will beg to pay if they can only get tickets.

But the playoffs? Now that would hurt. And hurt it should.

"No tolerance" means "no tolerance" for everybody.

So I took some heat for saying the Moss move was overrated. Evidently, the NFL held the SB yesterday and the Pats won the Trophy with Randy Moss taking home MVP honors.

Get a grip folks.

I understand that anytime one voices opinions, many will disagree. But some of the responses were kinda silly. I guess the ether made some forget that the mere possibility exists that the Jets simply aren't that good (like I said) and the Pats (and Moss) simply had a great game.

Not like it's a sixteen game season with 15 games left and  then the post season, huh?

But you geniuses are right. Randy Moss turned back time and erased a history of being a team cancer, no one will expose the facts that NE can't run the ball, and every QB in the NFL has the same 3-yard pop-gun as Pennington. The Pats LB's are all 25 again, the Jets WR's are a juggernaut, Richard Seymour means nothing to the Pats D, and of course one game "does a season make".

What I can't understand is how the Steelers thumped the Browns yesterday and didn't at least win a Division title? I mean they won by 27, and the Pats only won by 24.

How do you think the Indianapolis Colts feel? They whipped the Aints by 31, and didn't even get a WC birth.

So for all those "bold" geniuses who had the nerve to put themselves out on a limb and offer an opinion after the fact . . . . .

Get back to me in week 8, you bozos.

Now come the 5 months for which we wait seven months every year. The time when our best available type of modern gladiators suit up and demonstrate all the vicissitudes of human existence in a childs game, played by adults on a field and in the hearts of men.

Forget about the part-timers, the adolescent-filled, rah-rah, sis-boom-bah, watered down, version played at the collegiate level. Forget the desperation that makes us tune into the CFL for as long as we can tolerate the silliness of three downs and a rouge. Forget about the half game called Arena ball. The real thing is here now. The offseason headlined by sickness and depravity is over. Let the games, the only games that matter, begin.

All that said, here are some subplots from some noteworthy games today.

CHI-SD

Here are two teams destined to fall off this year. I'm sorry SD fans, you have a load of talent and the best young QB I've seen since God knows when. But you also have Norv Turner. And at some point this season, the Chargers will begin looking like a team full of inmates running the asylum. Nowhere to go but down for SD.

Da' Bears-I don't see either NFC finalist making it back this year. No, I'm not hatin' on Rex, I just see the NFCN getting a little better and Lovie Smith continuing to struggle to establish an offensive identity for the Bears. I think Lovie says the right things about Grossman, but I'm not sure he's sold on his QB.

And I think the Bears made a huge mistake letting Ron Rivera go.

Packers-Eagles

GB's defense will be the heart of the Packers, not the worn out, tired, game-busting act of crybaby Favre. That's good for Pack fans. The bad news is the primadonna refuses to retire and cede the job to (finally ready) Aaron Rodgers.

In Philly, it's the beginning of a swift end to the Donovan McPuke era. Ther's little question that Eagles have grown tired of the increasingly brittle, big game, human barf-box of a QB who never fit in the system into which he was forced. Don't be surprised to see big 5 on the big bench by game 12. The Eagles are getting older and talent thin on both sides of the line. That spells trouble for veteran choke-dog, QB's. Still, Jimmy Johnson will have the D playing hard in a very soft division.

Panthers-Rams

Yes the Panthers are over-rated, again. But maybe Jake Delhomme is capable of another unconscious season. Tthen again, maybe he's got Kurt Warner syndrome, meaning the aliens have returned his real body and taken the pod back. Who cares? Carolina simply isn't that talented.

And the Rams? Please. If one more talking head predicts the return of the "greatest show on turf" I'm going to "McNabb" in my helmet. Here's why; The rams no longer have Faulk, Holt and Bruce are old, and Bulger is not the "alien" Kurt Warner. Bulger reminds me a lot more of Neil O'Donnell than the Kurt Warner pod. That's why the Rams kick FG's now.

KC-HOU

Herman Edwards will make huge strides towards creating his own identity for the Chiefs. The bad news is that means kicking FG's and losing in the first round of the playoffs. I love Herm as a person, but he's not a top flight HC.

The Matt Schaub era begins in HOU. That means things will be better for Texxon fans. But they're still the Texans, and one good personnel decision doesn't cancel out the lingering legacy of Tony Boselli, and wasted moves like Mario Williams and Ahman Green. Will they be better, yes. Contenders, no.

DET-OAK

Luke McCown, Josh McCown, Cade McNown, Les Brown and his Band of Renown, who cares? They all suck at QB. Of course, any time Adam Schefter reports something, I only believe it if it's already happened. But here's what matters, it'll probably be about 2 quarters before we see Duante Culpepper under center. What bothers me is that Lane Kiffin is so sissyfied that he feels like a career nobody with mor reps is a better bet than a vet who has put up some great numbers in the past. Hell, I probably know the Raiders offense better than Culpepper, but Kiffin didn't call on me this Sunday.

John Kitna will put up big numbers and still be a loser. Here's why. He's Jon Kitna. And can Detroit stop anyone from scoring?

PIT-CLE

Charlie Frye is counting the minutes until Romeo Crennell goes to Brady Quinn. So are Browns Fans. Jamaal Lewis is soft, but Quinn will have some weapons. I doubt he'll save Romeo's job though. Bill Cowher will have his dream job next year.

I see the Steelers struggling with the "new" offense for the first 4-6 games, especially because of a suspect OL.  Colon is unproven, Simmons will wear down (AGAIN), Mahan is a huge upgrade over the one-legged Hartings but learning, Faneca is not going to play hard and had been getting blown up frequently the lst few years (hence the non-extension), and Smith has always been below average at LT.

But the D will be better. The big reason is the "loss" I keep hearing about in Joey Porter. In James Harrison the Steelers get a stronger, every down, every game player. Porter's most consistent performance in the last 5 seasons came from his jaw. And at least one of the two top picks at LB will be a beast. Maybe both.

This team could win 12 games, or 9, depending on how the OL comes together.

TEN v. JAX

VY will struggle. Teams will employ the Cunningham/Stewart/Vick defense and shout down his run options. He'll still be brilliant at times, but only against cellar dwellers.  TN will also not run the ball like they did last year as LenDale White develops into a pro RB. It's all necessary, though. The Tacks have to take a step or two back to go forward.

JAX will still be stellar on defense. But the whole Leftwich fiasco will expose the fact that when you have two QB's, you really have none. Garrard never took the job from Leftwich and has been downright horrible at times. Until Jax drafts or signs a QB, they're not a playoff team.

TB-SEA

TB rests squarely on the oft injured Carnell Williams. Jeff Garcia is not a long term answer, nor are any of the 17 other QB's in TB. The D will be good as always. Simeon Rice will not be missed. This is an average football team, with a tremendously overrated (Switzer Rule) coach.

Seattle has a superstar running back with a chronic broken foot and a QB with a bum shoulder attached to a gimp arm. Yuk. The crybaby coach rushing to make excuses for underperforming players doesn't help either.

NE-NYJ

The addition of Randy Moss is the most overrated FA addition since Yancey Thigpen to TEN. The run game is suspect, and Tom Brady has a chronic shoulder that will not get better with time.

The D is also getting older at LB and very thin at  DL and DB. This team is not the SB gimme the gabbers are gabbing about.

Jersey B will suffer from a Mangini-over this year. QB problems will ensue as Pennington continues to struggle with throws over 3 yards. Vilma is a beast and the D will be solid, but this team just lacks tools on offense.

ATL-MIN

The good news is that the Falcons are finally playing  a QB at QB. The bad news is that it's Joey Harrington. But the Falcons will be better with Joey than Michael. Write it down. Not because Harrington is that good, but because Vick was the most overrated "QB" ever. I don;t knwo what to expect from Petrino defensively, but I know that JM Jr. had lost his team on both sides of the ball. I can't see the D being any worse.

Big story in MIN was that Travaris Jackson called Peyton Manning this pre-season. I could call the Pope, but it wouldn't make me a priest. What on earth is Brad Childress smoking? Then he trades for a career rumdum like Holcomb? The situation in MIN proves the old saying, "when you have no QB's, you have no QB".

BAL-CIN

The Ravens will be tough on D. They will also be tough on their fans when thay have the ball. The addition of Willis McGahee is a question mark for me, mostly because I wonder that knee will last 4-5 seasons. McNair got hot last year, but he's clearly not what he used to be.

CIN will always be a play or two from 12-4 or 4-12. This team simply lacks character all over the place. Marvin Lewis needs to start running a football team instead of a halfway house.

DAL-NY

What's the over under on how long Jerry Jones will kid himself into thinking Wade Phillips is a HC? I give him two seasons to completely waste the talent haul Parcells built in DAL. and Pardon me, Tony Romo, you've played 5 good games. So did Scott Mitchell.

Is this Eli's make it or break it year? No. Manning will be better. It is Tom Coughlin's make it or break it year, though. Bill Cowher should send Coughlin, Crennel, Wilson, and Turner fruit baskets now, for exploding his market cap.

MIA-WAS

Does anyone care? Does anyone want to see Joe Gibbs destroy his legacy? Does anyone want to see a Miami team without a guy named Shaquille on it?

DEN-BUF

Trent Edwards is the franchise QB in Buffalo. Someone please tell JP Loseman he should pack his bags now. Dick Jauron will drive Bill Cowher's stock even higher.

DEN-This is the SB team no one says is going to the dance. The D will be above average, but the O could be explosive. Cutler might yet be the best of the Rivers, Roth, Cutler trio. And don't underestimate Shanahan, ever.

 

Terrel Owens says he's been to dogfights down South, that they're common. Clinton Portis wasn't surprised and said that dog-fighting was no big deal. Even Stephon Marbury chimed in when the subject arose. But leave it to Whoopie Goldberg to clear it all up for us. Evidently, we should cut the ex-Falcon QB, current felon a break because dog-fighting is a "cultural thing".

Thank you Whoopie. Even though you had no answers when Joy Behar asked you if animal electrocution and murder were "cultural things", you really cleared it up for me. So I'm perfectly willing to drop my beef with Ron Mexico and those who support him with such reasoning, with only one requirement.

They just have to acknowledge that the racism, seperatism, lynchings, and murders that took place in the first half of the 20th century, were just a "cultural thing". Slavery too; just a "cultural thing". The KKK, and hate mongers in general;  just a cultural thing.

You see folks, it's very easy. Once one excuses abuse, torture and murder as a cultural affect, one doesn't get to choose which abuses, tortures and murders are acceptable.

Like Heidi Klum says, "it's fashion baby, you're either in or your out".

One either blithers ridiculous excuses for sociopathic/psychopathic behavior or they don't.

Of course I can't help but wonder, like MattFaw asked, how much Whoopie would have had to say if it was David Carr who bankrolled dogfighting and tortured and murdered animals. Would it be a "cultural thing" then, Whoop?

Actually, I don't wonder. There's no question in my mind that Whoopie would have had either nothing to say, or she would be lambasting any white QB at every turn.

Because dogfighting is not a "cultural thing". It's a gruesome excuse to experience the most base and prurient primal instincts. Just like tying black me to the back of cars and dragging them until they're torn to pieces, is not a "cultural thing". Just like raping black female slaves is not a "cultural thing". They're just acts of depravity.

So let's call it by its right name folks. Whoopie is a flaming racist, hates white people and will dive headlong at any excuse to minimize the crimes perpetrated by blacks.

Now, making excuses regardless of how heinous one's actions are, that's a "cultural thing".

 

(For those of you who don't understand the term 'literary device", the title is merely an effort to see how much enmity I can provoke and still get buried by the Fox webmasters)

The NFLN just broke the story that the Jacksonville Jaguars have reversed course and chosne David Garrard over the offseason anointed starter, Byron Leftwich. Not only that, Byron will be leaving town at the behest of the JAX FO.

Leave it to Rich Eisen to practically sob over Leftwich's ultimate trade or release, only 9 days before the opener. If that wasn't enough, NFLN "insider" Adam Schefter, when asked if it was a money issue, said "no it wasn't a consideration, but it was a consideration". Okay, that's not an actual quote, just satire.

But here's the secret folks, it was about money. Money and progress. Leftwich was scheduled to make over $5mm this season, and aside from his string of injuries an 50% on the field ratio the last few years, Leftwich simply wasn't getting any better as a QB. Too much money for too little progress. Forget the strories of him playing on a broken leg at Marshall. He didn;t play with a borken toenail in Jacksonville. Five years later, his release was still "sundial fast", his weight was still an issue, his energy and leadership were questionable and he just didn't put points on the board. So goodbye Byron.

Before Rich Eisen soaks another crying towel, let's not sweat for the helfty Leftwich. He'll instantly wind up either in KC, Minnestota, Oakland, Atlanta, NY (either one) Cleveland, Dallas, or maybe even Tampa Bay. I hear Gruden plans to keep 10 QB's this year. I fully expect the NAACP to hang Arthur Blank in effigy though, if he doesn't immediately trade for Leftwich and sign him to a 10-year, $150mm extension. Anything less would be racism.

Let's not start crying about how unfair it is to Leftwich, shall we? The guy collected mint for being a part time QB and never raising his game a single inch. Now some desperate team will throw another load of cash at Byron for five more years of mediocre, part-time performance. The sad fact is though, the Falcons, Vikings, Chiefs, Browns, Bucs would be  better off with Leftwich than what they have right now. Even if Vick wasn't rotting in jail where he belongs, Leftwich still is the better man in ATL. Quinn is not ready, and I won;t even mention the crumbums starting in Minnysoda, KC and the undersized retread in TB.

So big deal, the Jags cut Leftwich. They got tired of paying $5mm for an average QB who gets hurt a lot, and now they're gonna pay maybe a mil or two to a average QB who "can beat you with his arm and his legs". Translation: In a few years he'll be a backup punter or starting for an Arena league team.

They'll be a few surpirses before this weekend is over, but for me, this wasn't one of them. Players constantly hold teams hostage until the last minute with the cry "it's just business". So Wayne Weaver kept Leftwich until the 11th hour even though the FO and staff didn't have faith in him. Well, you reap what you sow guys.  Loyalty is no longer a noun in NFL parlance for either side. It's a business, you know.